Monday, April 17, 2017

Forecasting Boeing 2017, Huh

Boeing will drop hundreds of engineers soon as its sales team reports a down year. Anyways that's my take on the Boeing memo to "bubble" employees otherwise known as last hired first fired or turning 55 is so hard to do Boeing work groups.

Memo Quote:

"We are moving forward with a second phase of involuntary layoffs for some select skills in Washington State and other enterprise locations," the memo said. "We anticipate this will impact hundreds of engineering employees. Additional reductions in engineering later this year will be driven by our business environment and the amount of voluntary attrition."

Okay so 2017 sucks to be in Boeing's Workers Anonymous Union (WAU) or fondly referred to as "wow" with those who jockey at a CAD. 

Image result for alfred e neuman
Boeing's VCMCO Explaining To The Shop Steward What's Up With That
see seven or eight or seven paragraphs below for what is a VCMCO??

The WAU disciples are facing what sales call a down year and somebody has to pay while stockholders can invest into more Boeing stock when incentivized by the WAU layoffs.

Boeing is "moving forward", so speaks the memo to the minions. Every "cube" matters group is hosting last day office parties months ahead of the ax falling on hundreds of engineers who have little justification for being there in front of its CAD screens. Drawing lines from the engine to the stern of anything with wings is not needed since sales are forecasted sluggish. "Analyze this" is the battle cry coming from corporate top floors sitting above the engineers. Sales are sluggish in 2017 and Boeing will retrain engineers for finding gainful restaurant work from the North West to the South East, for those who "want fries with that".

The forecast signal from Boeing memos are more important than just a few hundred engineers. Production is full steam ahead and no production workers should worry during the remainder 2017.

The pending layoff is an efficiency and expense line item move for the stockholders. Boeing will hire more engineers next year. After-all, the 737 Max and 787-10 are now flying. The 777X program is too far north to worry about engineering program lay-offs at this time. The problem is Boeing has no up and coming new airplane project requiring more engineers. There are 10's of thousands of Boeing engineers remaining at work while even if 1,000 engineers are canned, it becomes a mere brow sweep of the back hand.

The wow union rep stands aghast at Boeing's signal to the masses as if Donald Trump were running things. After-all the union is trying so hard to cure workers from work related habitations with its twelve step program and they are only on step 3. Workers Anonymous Union will strike if forced into a lay-off. The chief argument is how can Boeing engineers not work at work during a lay off?

A loud upper floor back slap is heard down stairs after the memo was distributed and reported in the news cycle. Going 4-5 years to engineering school is no guarantee of continuous employment after 55. Those who go to their first class reunion could be dismissed. Going to class reunions is a rite of passage just as the pink slip is a badge of honor for those students who still have loans outstanding.

WAU union demands a meeting with Boeing Engineering executives. The question is posed to upper management, "why can't we not work?” in perfect cube grammar? 

The executive answers with an affirmative huh? "If engineers can finding something to do to support the sales campaign in 2017, they can keep their jobs", says the Vice Chief Minion of CAD Operations (VCMCO). "However, we have this memo voted upon from the board and the copy machine has issued it to everyone. It will take until 2018 before the board runs out of copy machine toner and thus reversing this memo, in question."

The wow guy pipes in with strong tones, "The reduction in force engineers will remove the copy machines and its toner before the first of June if lay-offs occur."

The VCMCO provides Boeing leadership jargon to the WAU shop steward,... 

"It is "our" opinion that the fact finding committee after exhaustive research has come to an imperative conclusion, it is its opinion which demands a reduction in force. The research also concludes those who have an anonymous union work card are not needed until further notice for which the copy machine will advise the WAU of any changes, is that clear?" The shop steward succinctly says, "wow"!

The VCMCO then retorts, "Further-more, the board has advised a determination for all engineers that sales numbers are low and will advise at which time if a sale is made with any of the the single aisle, duo aisle or military segments for which a reconsideration becomes eminent for any announcement concerning the work force!"

The shop steward replies, "Huh".

Then we are in agreement with our huh's, say the VCMCO?